Welcome To A Road Less Traveled

In The Name Of Love...

We walked hand in hand...
We did it in the name of love...
We took our stand...
We did it in the name of love...
We sacrificed more than you'll ever lose...
We did it in the name of love...
We were on the news...
We did it in the name of love...
We had our reasons...
We did it in the name of love...
We would do it all over, for the same reasons...
We did it in the name of love...
We planned a future together...
We did it in the name of love...
We stood strong together...
We did it in the name of love...
We took our turns...
We did it in the name of love...
We addressed our concerns...
We did it in the name of love...
We broke the silence...
We did it in the name of love...
We spoke out on the violence...
We did it in the name of love...
We carried the torch...
We did it in the name of love...
We sat in a swing on the front porch...
We did it in the name of love...
We gave of our hearts...
We did it in the name of love...
We had of our own parts...
We did it in the name of love...
We reached out...
We did it in the name of love...
We cleared up all the doubt...
We did it in the name of love...
We walked away from the fights...
We did it in the name of love...
We reached new heights...
We did it in the name of love...
We fought for our rights...
We did it in the name of love...
We were in the spotlights...
We did it in the name of love...
We shared...
We did it in the name of love...
We dared...
We did it in the name of love...
We prepared...
We did it in the name of love...
We cared...
We did it in the name of love...
We declared...
We did it in the name of love...
We paired...
We did it in the name of love...
We walked with pride...
We did it in the name of love...
We cried...
We did it in the name of love...
We opened up eyes wide...
We did it in the name of love...
We died...
We did it in the name of love...
We taught...
We did it in the name of love...
We did a lot...
We did it in the name of love...
We grew strong...
We did it in the name of love...
We will one day right the wrong...
We will do it in the name of love...
We will continue to fly our symbol of our love...
We will do it in the name of love...
We stand proud of our flag of bright colors...for it was made in the name of love...
In the name of love...

In The Name Of Love...
Let It Fly Freely...
In The Name Of Love...
Let The Rainbow Flag Show...
In The Name Of Love...
Let Our Love Flow...
In The Name Of Love...
Let Our Love Grow...
In Name Of Love...
Let The Hate Go...
In The Name Of Love...
Living Proof...His Living Years...

All Rights Reserved By: C.P.D.C.

If you will click on the title you can go straight to the link where I found this. When I read this article, which is pretty current news, I was simply stunned. I was stunned on many levels. To have a hate crime of this magnitude to go on in the community I recently moved away from sent chills down my back... To have a hate crime this brutal to someone I knew (not a close friend) put tears in my eyes... To have adults withold information that could help catch these murderers, stuns me. I simply do not get it!! I have seen individuals in this community turn their back on what they know to be unjust and unfair before, but to this magnitude? I would never have thought in a million years anyone would do what is listed in the article I ran across.

Actually, I do not know if the article is accurate in all fairness, and if it is not accurate I would love to know about it. It certainly would help how I feel to know this is not true. However, from what I have seen within the community this is to have occurred, I truly should not be too surprised.

Additionally when I read this, the following came to mind:

First They Came for the Jews

First they came for the Jews
I did not speak outbecause I was not a Jew.

Then they came for the Communists
I did not speak out because I was not a Communist.

Then they came for the trade unionists I did not speak out because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for me and there was no one left to speak out for me.

Pastor Martin Niemöller

I have processed the reasons why a bar full of people would turn their back on a woman who was drunk. And perhaps I understand because some professionals go there for Happy Hour and are afraid of being outted. But I do not understand how any decent human being could have allowed this woman to be groped by three straight men, how any bar owner or bartender could have served her to a blivy and then allowed this to happen, or how any responsible person could have allowed three men with a clear agenda to remove this woman from the bar. I don't care what anyones job title is or where anyone works... There comes a time one has to stand up... If these men get away with this others are going to be placed in harms way. I also realize some of this may be well meaning friends of the bartender or bar owners. It seems to me the taking of a person's life is far more important than any fine the bar or bartender could receive. I also understand that the owner of this bar has been missing for over a year and possibly two years. I have to ask myself as quiet as his disappearance was kept and this bar is still running, if there are concerns about more surfacing around the bar owner's disappearance. I cannot help but ask myself at this point because of the magnitude of blatent selective blindness as to what has happened to Pat. Additionally I understand the fear of not having any place as gays and lesbians to go in such a small community. Well, there comes a time when one's social life is not the most important issue. It may very well be someone elses life you are saving down the road. Last but not least Pat's family deserves closure. AND these men need to be held accountable. IF YOU KNOW SOMETHING, PLEASE DO THE RIGHT THING AND CONTACT THE AUTHORITIES.

I guess I have said what I believe needs said... If this turns out to be an inaccurate article I would appreciate it if someone would send me the correct version of it.

Is it not enough that we have been betrayed by a world who does not understand us, that we do not betray one another?

Nuff Said
Lorretta

Hate Crime in South Texas Article Woman Killed While "Walking" On SH 35
Pat's Obit
The Truth About Texas Hate Crime Legislation

Well here I am in Foley, Alabama. I have been here going on two months. While I do miss living in Pensacola and the dream of living in Pensacola, I am reasonably happy here. What is happiness anyway? Who knows!! What may have made me happy 4 years ago certainly might have a different impact today.

Some of the updates... I live close to the Bon Secour River and I have fishing back in my life. It is beautiful here.... I could not ask for a nicer area to live in. The area I live is filled with so many trees that one cannot even hear the rustle of the wind.

Two major additions have been added to my life... Well more really if you factor in the wonderful people I have met here besides these two additions. I have finally commited to someone and have settled down. Not an easy task for me, as I am so used to being alone. The second little person in my life is Alex, who is three years old. I cannot help but appreciate him. So full of life this little guy is, and so eager to learn about so many things in the world.

I have not blogged for some time as I have been in physical therapy, which took a lot of my physical and emotional energy. Along with moving the infamous molds from Pensacola to Foley. hahaha On the physical therapy, I will give them credit!! My pain level has gone way down. And I actually got some mobility back. Not all, but it is certainly an improvement.

Well that will do for this post.

More Later.....

Well golly!! What a wonderful weekend. The woman I am dating had me come to her house Friday evening and I had the best time. She co-parents a 3 year old boy and it was fun to see the back yard set up to what I would have perceived as an entire park when I was his age, or perhaps even older.

Saturday we went out in her boat with her sister and a friend of hers. Had a blast!! The only thing that went wrong there is I was going to get out of the back of the boat in the bay and lost my balance. I fell into the bay.. Now that would not have been so bad, but my little dog Sassy was not at all impressed with her introduction to a body of water. She had never been swimming before. I was holding her and she went in right along side of me. It was amazing to see how this 4 1/2 pound creature adapted to the water so nicely though. She was actually swimming. Of course her little feet are not made to be a swimmer so I kept a close watch on her.

I got a bit of sun but it was not bad.. Mostly just sensitive to touch. It is the first time I have been in the sun long enough since 2002 to get any color on my skin at all. I did not realize how much I missed being out like that.

Then Sunday we went to church and it was so neat to see it being so full that chairs had to be placed in the fellowship area. Even then there was standing room only that was being used. I am sure we are all going to be excited about the new building being finished when it is. There is so much life at Holy Cross MCC it is not possible to leave without at least one blessing if not more than one. I know I say it a lot, but I did not realize how much I had missed this type of fellowship and so much life in the church.

I leave tomorrow for Rochester New York with the woman I am seeing. We will be gone just about 10 days!! I am all excited. I am hoping I will be able to see my step-sister Carrie on our way. I am also hoping to be able to see an old friend who once lived in Pensacola when I get there. That would be awesome.

When I get back from Rochester I will only be home one day and will be leaving for New Orleans to the Rainbow Revival. "The MCCGNO Rainbow Revival is a gathering of MCCers from the US Gulf Coast and their friends to acknowledge the first anniversary of Katrina, celebrate the care given and received in the past year and renew spirits for the future." I am excited about the gathering of the Gulf Coast churches participation in this!! This could just has easily have been any one of the Gulf Coast communities and I think it is important that all of the Gulf Coast MCC churches participate. Anyway I will be going in the church van, spending the night, and then doing the revival the next day. I bet I will be tired after all that traveling when I get home.

Well I have to scoot to Walmart to get food for the trip and for the critters. I still am getting ready and packing as well.

I will try to blog some on the trip, but won't be able to be on as much as now.

IF I KNEW

If I knew it would be the last time
That I'd see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time
that I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
and call you back for one more

If I knew it would be the last time
I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would video tape each action and word,
so I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time,!
I could spare an extra minute
to stop and say "I love you,"
instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
Well I'm sure you'll have so many more,
so I can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow
to make up for an oversight,
and we always get a second chance
to make everything just right.

There will l always be another day
to say "I love you,"
And certainly there's another chance
to say our "Anything I can do?"

But just in case I might be wrong,
and today is all I get,
I'd like to say how much I love you
and I hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone,
young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance
you get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow,
why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes,
you'll surely regret the day,

That you didn! 't take that extra time
for a smile, a hug, or a kiss
and you were too busy to grant someone,
what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today,
and whisper in their ear,
Tell them how much you love them
and that you'll always hold them dear

Take time to say "I'm sorry,"
"Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."
And if tomorrow never comes,
you'll have no regrets about today.

~~A Forward Floating On the Web
~~Author Unknown

Well I went to bingo with a delightful couple from church last Friday night. We had the best time. I did not win anything but we certainly had fun.

I could not help but laugh. I have a younger friend in Texas that called just as I was getting ready to go out the door for my wonderful evening out. I told her I had to go as I was going to be late for my friends showing up to go out. She asked where we were going and I told her to play bingo. She said.... Girl... You have absolutely hit the bottom... It has finally come to this. I was laughing so hard just the way she said it. You would have to know her to appreciate her humor and wit. Anyway I am looking forward to going and doing something just for fun again. Well back to my week...

I have uploaded the "Love" from the 50 Days of Love sermons by Rev Sandy O'steen to my website. Once again, it is an extremely slow load, but well worth the wait. This sermon is right in line with what I believe love should or should not be... I know I am pretty PolyAnna about it, but maybe a little PolyAnna in all of us is a good thing.

*****Just click on the title and it will take you there....

I will write more about it later but have to run over to the church...

Grace & Peace,
Lorretta

Today marks the fourth year my beloved friend Barbara left us. Without question I still miss her. She may have been one of the most crusty old-time butches I have ever known, but under all of that was one of the most intelligent people I ever knew. You had to know Barb to appreciate her... If you liked dry wit, she definitely had it... Yet she could make you madder than a hornets nest within seconds. She was probably the only one I have ever known who had the ability to get back in your good graces as quickly as she got out of it.

I learned so much from Barb in the years I knew her... She was my best friend and my most treasured confidant. Yet I knew she would call me on my stuff as she saw it. She kind of reminded me of a Yoda in many ways. So much wisdom she held!!

I enjoy the memories of the years I had Barb in my life as a friend. I still talk to her often and when I catch a fish I hold it up for her to see. While we cannot have our friends forever, hers is one friendship I still get much enjoyment from in the way of memories.

I miss you my Dear Friend.

Love
Lorretta

Pastor Sandy did a series during Lent on the 50 Days of Love... One of them was on Forgiveness. With her permission I have added it to my website. It is a slow load, but is well worth the wait... You may be asked to download a license when the page loads for the sermon. It is safe to do so and is not spyware or anything like that.

I will be adding the rest of the series over the next few days/weeks. I felt, however, this was a good place to start.

Forgiveness
http://lorrettasplace.com/forgiveness.htm

Grace & Peace,
Lorretta

I have added Poem's, Prayers, & Promises as a blog. If you have some you would like to see go up, please email me on the The Poems, Prayers, & Promises page..

Click on the title to go to Favorite Scriptures.

Thanks
~~Lorretta

Recently I asked my Pastor to do a sermon on TOO. I grew up in a time and part of the country where roles were not acceptable. That would have been California. It was not politically correct to ask a person if they were butch or femme. One would have been met with a curt answer of "I am NOT into roles," or "I am just me," or "I am androgynous." For me this goes far beyond roles really.. We seem to be in the generation of TOO. Either one is too butch or too femme, too tall or too short, too fat or too thin, and finally too young or too old.

Are we as a society so shallow we cannot look past the surface of others? Or perhaps with age we have distant memories that help define the roles we place on others and the expectations of what we perceive them to be. I cannot help but wonder how often we cheat ourselves of the gifts God has placed before us in other people. Yet we hear "too" so often in our lives.

There is an old saying called "never judge a book by its cover." How great it would be if people would take the time to read the book and then assess. How wonderful it would be if we as a society begin placing our attractions on what a person has to offer inside and their personality. For example, what if we were to fall in love with a person because of their deeds, or the way they treat those around them. Or perhaps even for the different aspects of life each of us have in common. Yet so often as individuals, we will never know who a person is inside because we are caught up in what the cover looks like. Even for some, they may absolutely adore who the person is inside, yet they will tell themselves they cannot be with a specific personality for friendship or relationships because they are "too butch or too femme... Or "too tall or too short." I wonder how many beautiful books of poetry have been tossed as a result of less than appealing covers? The words contained in these books still hold their beauty and splendor...

Perhaps there will come a time in our society whereas the beauty within will hold more importance than external beauty...

I have installed the MCC and Gay & Lesbian News Feeds on my site... It takes a few seconds to load so be patient....

http://www.lorrettawoodbury.com/news.htm

Well I have been here in Pensacola for a little over 5 weeks. Some things have not gone the way I planned, but perhaps it is not about what I planned, but is about what God has planned for me. I love it here and I love Holy Cross MCC. Most of the people are nice and so friendly. For anyone who has entertained the idea of attending Holy Cross MCC, know that you will be greeted with a warm welcome and people truly do try to make a difference in your life by letting you know you are wanted and welcome there.

Holy Cross MCC has a praise team that is absolutely awesome and you can tell they are there for God, spreading the word of Jesus Christ, and want others to participate. They do not have privatized labels... Just Praise Team. I like that as I am not into clique's at all.. It is fun to watch them sing and play their musical instruments and it is equally as fulfilling to experience being a part of a congregation that wishes to be involved. I did not realize how much I have missed this type of service.

I have not gone to their more conservative services, which is at 11:00, but I am ready to take that plunge. I also love Pastor David... He is such a gentle spirit and delivers such powerful messages within his kindness and soft demeanor. He has grown on me so much and I appreciate him a great deal. I plan to start going to the Wednesday service on a more regular basis so I can learn more from him.

I look at the strength of our church. They lost their building to Hurricane Ivan and have survived four moves. Yet one has to hunt for a place to sit at the 9:00 service if they did not get there early. I have always been fond of early morning services anyway so this has worked out well.

Sometimes I miss the familiarity of where I moved from, but as I am getting bolder and bolder and venturing further out, I am finding this to be a great fit. When I am out with people who are not with MCC yet, I find myself talking about MCC, my love for God, and my love for Jesus Christ. The great thing about that is once in a while someone wants to go to church and see what it is about.

One thing I have come to terms with recently is I have no desire to deny who I am and my love for the Jesus. I am sure it may turn off some, but I guess the whole point is I could not have it both ways...

Additionally I love scripturally based sermons, and I know I have found exactly that at Holy Cross MCC.

Thank you Holy Cross MCC for helping me feel welcome in your Church Family...

I suspect I have never realized the importance of remembering friends/family birthdays until recently. I have a friend I have known many years who has bilateral breast cancer. The treatments, more than the cancer, have certainly taken a toll on her system. I marked my calender to make certain I did not miss her birthday and called yesterday. I left a message and when she called me back I knew it was her so I sang Happy Birthday to her. Now if you have ever heard me sing it is enough for you to wish I would have remained silent or you laugh.. She laughed!! I guess when I got to the part and many more I thought about this internally. Will there be more? God only knows, but I am glad I was able to tell her happy birthday this year.

I guess the significance of this to me is how little effort it takes to pick up the phone and make someone I care about feel special, even if it be for just a few minutes. I look over the years of those who were special in my life and I did not take the time to pick up the phone and make them feel better for those simple few minutes.

While a work in progress and striving for perfection, I intend to continue to make that 5 minute difference in others lives. I am working on a list of little things I can do to make others feel good.

Well this certainly has been a nightmare... But I finally found a solution. AOL has dropped my rate to $4.95 a month. However, I was not about to place AOL software back on my machine... AND, the last thing I wanted to do is go to their webpages just to pick up more spyware.

I figured out how to configure my AOL accounts on Outlook 2003... It will not accept it if you select the POP account setting. You have to select IMAP.

~So go to Add New Email Account
~Fill in the blanks as you go
~When you get to the radio buttons select IMAP

~Your Name
~Your Email Address
~Incoming Map Server = imap.aol.com
~Outgoing Mail Server = smtp.aol.com
~User Name:
~User Password:

~NOW click on more settings:

~Type in the Name you want to appear on your folder in Outlook
~Click on the tab Outgoing Server and Check My outgoing server (SMTP) requires authentications
~Now click on advanced and on the Outgoing server Port (SMTP) = Change this from 25 to 587
~Select Ok
~Repeat this process for all screen names you have.

What will happen is all of the folders you had on AOL will show up right in Outlook. LESS ALL THE GARBAGE AND SPAM...

Before you delete AOL, save all your important emails that are in the filing cabinet to ON AOL... This only handles what is server side on AOL.

Whoever runs across this, if you run into a snag let me know so I can tighten up my directions... However this will work.... Just picture this as a mirror of your aol account and you will do fine.

I have spent the last 10 hours working on my computer. I discovered uninstalling aol, EACH TIME I UNINSTALLED IT, did NOT uninstall it. And then... I had called AOL indicating I was ready to quit and they must have downloaded something on me as the last install I did on it would NOT let me uninstall everything. So I had to go into the properties and uncheck the read only properties on every single file.

Just to get a virus program on here I spent hours getting their lousy files off this machine. Thanks to SystemsWorks I was finally able to accomplish this... Even then it was a chore... Soooooo ... then I go check to see what has expressed access to my computer in my firewall. Over 100 aol checkboxes were checked and I know I did not check them.

AOL really need to have someone stomp on their toes good!! My computer was rendered almost useless... Even with my amount of computer background it was a gruelling task!! I was almost to the point it was going to be worth it to make my primary drive a secondary drive to save all the programs and install a new primary drive.

Yahoo, ICQ, and SBC Global were not much better and I had to remove a lot of files from them as well, but once I got all the AOL files removed the difference was significant.

Well I think I have ranted long enough about this!! At any rate Wipe it on SystemsWorks is worth its weight in Gold!! Thanks so much to the person who put me onto it.

This evening I went on a Dolphin charter with a group of women from WSO, an organization here in Pensacola for women that does get togethers. What a great time I had!!! It was so nice to be on the ocean and have the opportunity to visit with these women. There were couples and singles. It was so fun to see dolphins jumping around the boat. This was just about the most down to earth bunch of women a person could possibly want to meet. I am glad I went. I came close to chickening out on going several times throughout the day. This was an extra event, but they get together at least once a month. I am looking forward to getting to know them better. It simply amazes me for the size of this community how many things there are to go do here. If anyone from Pensacola runs across this and wants to go to WSO functions, email me and I will forward it on to the people who organize this.

What a great 4th of July this week was. On the fourth I went to some peoples home from church. They are very family oriented and there were at least 3 generations of family there. How fun to watch the children frolic, play, and try to be helpful towards the adults. Just genuine fun!! I tried something I have not tried since the impairment of my arms. They must keep getting better slowly, as a year ago I could not have considered doing this. I actually played horse shoes. Not necessarily the best game of horse shoes, but I was able to do it. I had to ice down that night and the next morning. Still not sure if the tradeoff was worth it, but at least I know I can do it... I wonder if others were sore the next day?

I am still muddling my way around to find my way around Pensacola, but it is getting done. Learning where everything is has been quite a challenge. I thought Corpus Christi was challenging when I moved there a number of years ago. It will be neat when one day someone says "how do I find yada yada," and I can tell them right where it is. Or at least point at the direction.

I am meeting people slowly but surely... Right now I just need to meet a few nice folks to bounce around with... I have been asked to go to eat this week and that should be fun... One thing I had forgotten and have found to be true once again is the question that comes to my mind when I am asked to go do things, is knowing if it is just to bounce around or a date. Right now I just need to make friends and am not ready to make such a profound move as to date. I tend to like keeping dating outside of my church family and/or social circle. Perhaps it is the ego factor if it does not work out, or purely the legistics of their continued presence if it does not work out. I wonder if straight folks have the problem of knowing if it is a date? When guys used to ask me out I assumed it was a date... When women ask me to go places I sometimes feel I need a clarifier; Regardless if I am interested or not. I have always felt awkward asking... Perhaps even moreso if I am not interested. Ö¿Ö

Also planning on getting some fishing in this weekend!! I am so looking forward to it.. I love my ocean and feel the need to fish as much as I used to. Still have not found any shrimp boats. :-D Well off to get my day started.

Well this was fun to update... I have added the affirmations page back on my site with updates...
http://www.lorrettawoodbury.com/affirmations.htm

Well here it is the 4th of July and I am planning on going to a BBQ!! I am excited about it!! My morning was spent ripping my home apart looking for my billfold. Nothing I hate worse than losing something as it is such an out of control feeling. Well after an hour and a half and a very out of control panic stricken feeling I finally found it. Now I have to spend hours putting this place back together. Oh Well.

I felt bad because I was supposed to take my friend to the base to see her husband who is in the hospital.. No Drivers license .. No getting on the base.. Hope her neighbor took her!! She has given so much to me in my life that I hated letting her down one of the few times she asked something important of me.

Well now I guess I should get ready for the BBQ and get some tasks done. Starting with putting everything back where it came from.

Have not decided if I should go see the fireworks tonight or not tonight. I love firework displays but don't know my way around Pensacola well enough to know where to park or not to park. With this honker van that becomes relevant very quickly. Mostly from the standpoint of a place to park it. I am not in the least sorry that is what I have though, as it awards me the privilege of doing so many things with it I could not have done otherwise.

Well it is task-time..